Seneca on Grief
Letters on mourning and how to bear loss.
2 letters
Letter 63: On Grief For Lost Friends
Seneca counsels Lucilius against excessive grief over the death of their friend Flaccus, arguing that while some sorrow is natural, unrestrained mourning serves only vanity and self-display rather than genuine remembrance. He advocates cherishing the memory of lost friends as a bittersweet pleasure, maintaining other friendships, and recognizing our shared mortality—lessons Seneca himself learned through his own immoderate grief for Annaeus Serenus.
Letter 99: On Consolation To The Bereaved
Seneca argues against excessive grief over the death of a small child, contending that death is natural and inevitable for all humans and that the brief life of a child should be accepted with equanimity rather than lamented. He criticizes those who seek pleasure mixed with grief and insists that while natural tears are permissible, sustained mourning should be abandoned in favor of rational acceptance and cherishing memories without bitterness.